Saturday, October 10, 2009

Until I See You Again

Oh child, precious one Let your life shine like the sun

But you say

“How long ‘til I can come home‘Til I can rest in your arms again”

And I say

“Not long but don’t miss this life and I’ll be Waiting ‘til then”

Live with the wonder of a child

Pray with your arms thrown open wide

Love with a love that has no end

Until I see you again

Oh child, precious one With each breath know you are loved

But you say

“How long ‘til I can come home‘Til I can rest in your arms again”

And I say

“Not long but don’t miss this life and I’ll be Waiting ‘til then”

in memory of my little girl Asarelaha Janae Mogul
Your life, however short lived it may have been, has impacted my life so greatly. The thought of the beautiful little girl and amazing women you could have been will never be forgotten. I have dreamed about you often. Not a day goes by that i dont wish you where here with me. I think of all the fun we could have had together. Dresing you up in cute little outfits, your first words, your first steps, your first day of kindergarten. Talks about boys when you were older, first dates, first break up, getting your drivers liscnse..... I wish so badly I could take it back. I want more than anything that i could watch you grow up. Im sorry I never gave you that chance to live. I, your mother, the one who gave you life, also gave you death. I was selfish and scared. I pray that you will find away to forgive me for the horrific thing that I have done to you and know that you are loved and that It is because of you that I now know God. It is because of you that I promise to try and help as many people as I can from making the same mistake as I have. I know you are in heaven looking down upon me and i know that our Heavenly Father is taking care of you. I wont let you down. One day when i have more children I will tell them of their sister before them. I know you would have been a good big sister. One day I know God will reunite us. Until that day Asarelaha, I live my life in memory of you.
your mother

Friday, October 9, 2009

GRAPHIC PICTURES:Throw your Baby in the Trash

how abortions are being done in hospitals

There is hope...
actual baby thrown away by medical staff

7 month old baby aborted

9 week old aborted

Disposing of a baby has become like disposing of your trash. You dont want it so you get rid of it. How can we devalue a humans life to that of trash? Hospitals nationwide are doing just that because abortions go wrong and babies are born alive. So instead of trying to save the babies life the babies are taken to a room left on a counter until they die and then trown out.
Becoming pregnant is not a punishment its a gift of life. It is not up to us to choose to let the child live or die.
Sure getting an abortion is easy. One phone call is all it takes. Go in have it done and return back to your normal lifestyle, Right? Well think again. Thousands of women are suffering silently across the US because they are told that they are weird or not normal for feeling guilt or remorse or even depressed because they had an abortion. They are told the abortion is normal that its ok. That you have "made the right choice". That you should be happy and after all it was just a "blob". Did you know that by 8weeks a babies hands and feet begin to develop you can start to see the heart and brain. Did you know there have been numerous test done proving that at 8weeks of age a baby can feel pain. So when your getting your abortion done don't think the fetus can't feel a thing because your baby inside of you is dying a slow and pain full death. No One deserves to die this way!!!!
God will forgive you of your sins...
"If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness." (1 John 1:9)
Hell is real! but Jesus will save you if you believe...
For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord. - Romans 6:23
That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved. For with the heart man believeth unto righteousness; and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation. For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved. - Romans 10:9,10,13

Thursday, October 8, 2009

I regret MY abortion

My name is Nicole I am 23yrs old and i regret my abortion.
At time of my abortion I was 22. I was in a verbally abusive and what soon turned into a physically abusive relationship with my then boyfriend. I had gotten pregnant. I was scared and didnt know where to go or what to do.Like you, I too thought i was alone. My boyfriend suggested i get an abortion because he wasnt ready. I love kids and have always dreamed of having them. How could i raise a child on my own? There should be 2 parents.I cried alone that night in my bed to afraid to tell my parents my family not even my best friend. I was ashamed that i had gotten pregnant outside of marraige and felt that i would be an embarrasement to my family.I called the clinc (planned parenthood) made all the arrangements. I thought this was the easy way out. Afterall who would find out??. I took the RU-486. Unaware at the time I was blessed and protected by God because i later learned of all the complications and deaths from the pill... It was a beautiful sunny day not a cloud in the sky as I drove myself and my boyfriend to the clinic on May of 2008 a day i will never forget 2 DAYS BEFORE MOTHERSDAY that i took that the first pill and one day before i had aborted my child. I started cramping i ran to the toilet all i remember is holding the tissue paper drenched with blood dripping all over my hands and looking at the tissue paper at what appeared to be a "BLOB" as the PLANNED PARENTHOOD employees so nicely put it. That "BLOB" turned out to be my baby. I took the tissue paper with the 8week old fetus and threw it in the toilet and flushed it. It wasnt until a couple days later that i realized what i had done. I had just held my 8week old baby and then flushed it down the toilet like a dead goldfish. I became numb, distant, depressed. I had recently strarted a new job and had no friends for the first 8-10months of working there. I pushed everyone away. I thought I was alone. I didnt know where to turn. You see planned parenthood made me feel like what I was going through was "not normal". They said it was a blob and that it was not anything, that i was "DOING THE RIGHT THING'' But it was something it was not an it, it was my baby who was developed had hands feet a heartbeat. My depression got so bad I wanted to die. I believed all the lies i was feed. I ignored God. Keeping silent almost killed me. I had came up with a plan. I decided i was going to drive head on into something. I was so scared id kill myself i wouldnt let anyone get in a car with me because at any moment i knew i could snap. I wanted to stop the pain. I wanted to stop the suffering the self torment the hatred i had for myself. How could i kill my child? I was a murderor. God will never forgive you. Your family will hate you. The words seemed to be whisperd in my ears over and over like a broken record The images flashed before me like a never ending horror movie. I felt like Bill Murray in Groundhog day. I seemed to relive that day over and over again. I didnt know how else to end it all but to die. I blamed God. I hated God. I asked HIM everyday... "WHY DIDNT YOU STOP ME?'' "WHY DIDNT YOU GIVE ME A WAY OUT?'' "WHY DID YOU LET THIS HAPPEN?''...HE replied "I DID TRY BUT YOU CHOSE TO IGNORE ME" You see 3 years prior God new what was going to happen. One day at work i saw a flyer for a Christian Pregnancy Crisis Help Center, at the time i didnt know why but i picked it up and brought it home and hung it on the fridge. Little did i know what the flyer truly meant to me and my life. Before i had the abortion I saw the flyer on the fridge and God was right HE gave me a way out and I IGNORED HIM! I looked at the flyer, there on the fridge, the day i found out i was pregnant. Instead of calling them I made my call to planned parenthood. A couple months later I remember grabing the flyer off the fridge yelling at God and getting into my car. I was headed to work but didnt plan on making it that far. I started to cry uncontrolably I wanted to die i thought today is the day to end the pain. But God had other plans for my life.... Something made me pull over that somethign was GOD and i started crying out to God for forgiveness for mercy for help i looked over and the flyer was on the passenger seat. I picked it up and called the number to my surprise they offered Abortion counseling. That call saved my life. God never left my side he was there with me watching over me protecting me. I owe Him my life. I started the counseling and went through a couple month program. I recieved Healing and learned God loves me and has a purpose for my life as HE does for yours....

You see Your not alone. Don't believe the lies the media and the clinics try to portray. It is NORMAL to feel the way you do. Abortion is a trauma it is a death. It is normal to go through the stages of grief. Just remember you are not alone and you can be forgiven. There is hope. Our God is a merciful God. Slow to anger. He loves each and everyone of us and wants you to turn to HIM. He can help you. GOD CAN END THE SUFFERING. HE CAN TAKE AWAY THE PAIN
"Know therefore that the LORD your God is God; he is the faithful God, keeping his covenant of love to a thousand generations of those who love him and keep his commands. - Deuteronomy 7:9
The bible says "If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness." (1 John 1:9).
"Repent therefore and be converted, that your sins may be blotted out, so that times of refreshing may come from the presence of the Lord." (Acts 3:19)
God views sin as all the same. Abortion is no greater a sin then lying or stealing... Dont believe the lies. The enemy (the devil) will try and keep you silent because there is freedom and healing and power in speaking the truth and he does not want that.

Here are a list of sites that you can turn to for help....

24hour help hotline, anonymous--

after abortion counseling--